You would have been 32 yesterday. So very young to be a memory... but a memory is all I have to keep me going.

Since the funeral, I had not returned to the temple where your remains are housed. This was by choice as I want to believe that you are free from any earthly bounds. However, lately, I have been asking myself if I should go.

As your birthday drew nearer, I thought a lot about what we would do to celebrate your life. That part I was adamant to doing. The question was how. I had thought about donating to a charitable organization in your name but have not concluded as to which one.

The easy part was looking for your favourite food. 2 days back, CS and I ended up at a Japanese Restaurant at Plaza Damas. They had a membership concept very similar to Sushi King. When I was filling up the form, I included your name and bday in the form, thinking we may want to go back there for your bday.

Well we ended up trying a new place in town for lunch. This was a specialty shop offering roasted streaky pork. Really good and really oily just the way you would have liked it. For dinner we had take home Sweet and Sour Crabs coz your aunty Choo2 wanted to watch her favourite football team play.

I keep reminding myself that you are in a better place but its still very hard. I can't help missing you and still can't quite shake off the feeling of disbelieve..