Happy Birthday

I miss you.

A night of treats

Last weekend I was back in KL for my monthly visit. But what was so special about the last visit has everything to do with your mom. She hosted a birthday dinner for Raj at Bombay Palace (our first choice was Vansh but we found out that it has gone out of business); that was not all. We had Raj's parents with us, some thing we cherished, since it is not easy to get them eating out. We left the menu selection to Raj since he knows what everyone likes. Your mom was a perfect host that night, keeping everyone suitably entertained. To top it all, we noticed that we were attracting some attention from the other diners, who must be quite tickled seeing the two of us dressed up in sarees! Your mom looked fantastic in the orange color saree I got her when I was in India. And oh, Raj's mom had the foresight to bring a saree for me; it was a very sweet baby blue which suits my paler skin tone. Admittedly, we enjoyed the attention at dinner, and the company of Raj and his parents, of course. Somehow, I was reminded of the dinner with you and Li Huey at Mandarin Hotel.

Sometimes it rains but mostly its sunny

UK as usual was cold but Dorcus and I were pretty lucky when we were there. We had sun quite often. And guess what!, we (CS, Dorcus and I) went to the roller coaster them park in Blackpool. of coz, i had to go on the rides. I took them all in stride and went for seconds on the more adventurous ones.. hooray!!! You would have been so proud of me. Of coz you would also be having an amusing time watching me scream my head off. But it was all fun.

Austria was interesting as well. I got to 'act' local. Well, kinda. Johannes (my housemate for 5 months last year and soon to be for another 6 months) hosted my visit. I got to eat the local favorites and visited several interesting venues. The usual castles and churches but what stood out was the water trick castle. the entire castle is powered by water which is pretty cool. Even more so when visitors get rained on when they least expect it. Johannes's mom Heidi loaned me her Austrian traditional dress and we both got into gear for some pictures. When we were in the Salzburg city center, I saw some in candy color which i really like.

Yes, we sold both the cars. The wira and kancil in exchange for a brand new ford fiesta. You would approve and love driving it too. Its a pretty neat little car. Well not that little compared to the Kancil. Plus I got a really good deal and top service to boot. Can't ask for more :)

Recently I also got really motivated to bake sourdough bread and has produced 3 batches so far. My 3rd try seems more controlled. Making sourdough bread really feels like baby sitting. There so many technical aspects but once I got into the rhythm it was plain sailing. Well at least I think I've got it down pat. We shall how my next attempt goes.

I guess its been awhile since so plenty to share with you. Every time I think of writing, i tend to tear up and struggle thinking of keeping my tales on a lighter note. This evening I was watching CSI Miami and at the end of the show, they had a basketball game amongst Horatio's team members. It reminded me of the early days when we went up against your housemates with Steve. I still miss you my baby girl.

Love, mom

Hello!

Hi Mei Phing,

I was supposed to write to you a month back...but got so caught up with work...

Anyway, it's been nearly 4 years Balee and I met =) and I've heard many many wonderful stories about you. Your life in so many ways has inspired your brother to who he is right now. I am very sure you are proud of him...soon to be another PHD holder in the family =) Hopefully we will be able to attend his graduation next year...

Wendy says I should tell you stories about your brother's antics =D He's not going to like this lolsss...

But he is busy working on his research now...because Wendy and I will be partying in the UK next week!!! We will keep you posted with pictures this time ...

Dorcus

Bye, Wira

Last week, I traded in my car, the proton Wira, with a hint of sadness,I must say. The car has been with me for 14 years and 4 months, so much so that it has become a part of my life. I recalled the first time I drove the Wira it was out of sheer courage, and unnecessary risk taking. The day after I bought the Wira I had a dinner to go to. My initial plan was to take a cab since I didn’t feel comfortable driving at night and without taking a refresher driving course first. But after waiting for half an hour, I was getting impatient. My neighbor suggested that I should drive my car (that’s what you bought it for, right?), and despite my mild protest that I haven’t driven a car for more than 10 years I gave in after taking some driving instructions. It was a little adventure that could have gone wrong as my friend’s house was perched on a steep hill top and I almost failed to grab the brake.

The best memories, however, are reserved for you. Since you moved to KL to study, you would drive the car on weekend visits while I enjoyed being `chauffeured’. You would always take the car to the petrol station to pump the tires and check the condition of the spare tire, something that you would admonish me for failing to do so. You would always say, `aunty choo2, your spare tire is flat. You must always make sure it’s got air because you may need it.’

You became fond of the car so much so that you offered to buy it after you started work at Sime Darby. I remembered one day you offered cash upfront to underline the seriousness of your offer. The first thing you noticed was the `shiny’ tires, as I had just changed them. But as fate would have it, you left for the US to do your post doc. in May 2005. I kept the Wira for as long as I can since it reminded me of you. I’m sure, like me, you will miss the Wira too.

Good tidings

It has been a while since I last wrote. So far, life is good; which makes me wonder how long this run of luck will last. At work, I have received some recognition for my contribution to my company; while I couldn't be happier in my personal life. My health is good, and my relationship with the family keeps getting better. I met with everyone in Penang during Chinese New Year, and there was so much warmth and closeness in the family; some thing I haven't felt for a long time. Your mom is doing very well, and she deserves her job promotion. I'm happy for her; how could I not share this good news with you.

Letting go

I dreamt of you last night. I dreamt that you were at a performance with me and mid way you got up and danced with a friend. You were doing the Swing!! I've always thought of Swing as a fun and happy dance. I woke up with the thought that you are happy and you are now happier as I learn to be happier.

2010

Last night, we (your mom, Chean Shen, Dorcus and I) had dinner at your favorite restaurant Esquire Kitchen. We ordered the dishes that you liked such as the man tou dipped in black sauce, aubergine in bean paste, and chicken with cashew nuts. Btw, Dorcus is Chean Shen's girlfriend. During dinner, we chatted about the new car that your mom is looking to buy, a Ford sports model. Before dinner, we had gone to the Ford showroom to view the car which came in red, black, grey, blue and silver. Your mom seems to like the red. It's timely for your mom to upgrade to a better car considering she is likely to promoted end of the month. Chean Shen is back for a visit for 6 weeks and he is having a good time, eating his favorite food and meeting up with his friends. He has also put on a lot of weight, and is getting teased for his extra pounds.

In retrospect, I have had a good year, taking on more responsibilities at work and learning how to relax by practicing yoga. Still miss you very much.

aunty choo choo

Happy Bday!

Ah i'll be moving in a few months, just realized how much junk i've accumulated for the last 3 years. Every week i'm throwing out a big black back of trash....they seem rather unlimtied. But it's okay, i got months to pack. Moving out while on my holiday should save some cash as well.

Should say all is well with work, but i need to work harder. Next to work is keeping myself fit. The scales go up and down as they please, i have no control over my weight. Ah well.


Happy Bday sis.

Miss you lots.

September...

I was back in KL last weekend for the Hari Raya holidays. Predictably, I spent most of the time playing mahjong with your mum and kor kor (that's how you always addressed her). Not surprisingly, kor kor took home the winnings. Your mum and I were talking about going to Shanghai with your brother to see Ah Boy. The problem is that your brother has a packed itinerary as he plans to spend some time in KL, Penang and a short holiday in Bali, when he visits in December. Well, we'll see how it goes.

Back in Singapore, I managed to catch the replay of the US Open finals. To my delight, my favorite tennis player Rafael Nadal won. He has never won the US Open until this time around, and now has completed his career grand slam after winning at the French Open and Wimbledon earlier this year.

As I write, I'm thinking you're 35!!! Happy Birthday. I miss you very much.

Auntie choo choo

Photo shoot for a good cause

Your birthday is just around the corner and this year I got to invest time in helping the Orang Asli. This time, I modeled for a website that some friends of mine set up to help them market their craft to a wider audience. www.elevyn.com

I got 5 of my friends to join me in this photo shoot. It was a 4 hour session and we were pretty tired by the time we wrapped up but we also had a lot of fun. We started at 11am and finished at 3pm so we were basically happy to heap our plates with nasi kandar for our late lunch.

I guess partying till the wee hours the night before a photo shoot was not exactly smart but I enjoyed my new friends and was having a good time. I crashed the minute I got home but still woke up feeling really lethagic. The photos turned out really well but I think my skin tone may be a little sallow. Should have used a two way cake I suppose. Also should have touched up my lips more often. Well we are our worst critic I suppose.

Well that was the gist of what I did today. I hope your day was good my darling. I miss you much.

Aller Aller....GO TEAM!!

Your friend Gabriela trained and took part in a 1/2 marathon on June 6th as a member of the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society's (LLS) Team In Training. It was for a great cause: "to help stop leukemia, lymphoma, Hodgkin lymphoma and myeloma from taking more lives".

http://pages.teamintraining.org/mn/rnr10/gmadunicca

It was just the type of thing you would have done yourself and so I thought it really cool that she dedicated her efforts to your memory. An image of your sunny smile of approval hovers in my mind whenever I get an update from Gabby of her training.

Aller aller... GO TEAM!!

CNY 2010

Getting up at 5am to be at the airport by 6am is a chore. Even more frustrating, the flight to Penang was delayed by almost an hour! Thank goodness, by the time I touched down, all my angst had evaporated. My first destination was uncle Boo Eng's place; there I was re-acquainted with Teng Hin's 2 year old daughter who proved to be a tough cookie to handle. Karvin looks 16 when he is only 12; he must have easily weighed 60kg! By 12 noon, Teng Lye was ready to drop me off at my `other' family home. Everyone tells me that my biological mother, going to 88, is losing her memory but she still remembers my name. Thirty minutes later, I was whisked off to uncle Teik Ee's house; literally the `happening' place. Kids were running around, and aunty Ah Eng was busy cooking, as always. In fact, this year she has cut down the cooking having recently recovered from a slipped disc operation. Wen Loo, whom I haven't seen for a long time, greeted me and introduced his girl friend from China, who's probably gotten used to the extended family and its noisy way of doing things. You would be glad to hear that Wen Koay, your youngest cousin, is doing very well in school and is also involved in some programming consulting work for a Singapore company. I suppose all's well that ends well; I couldn't resist a mahjong game and ended up losing 100 bucks to Wen Wei and aunty Girly. On my way to the airport to catch the 7pm flight to KL, I received a call from Ah Bin and Ah Yeu who both chided me for choosing the mahjong game over them! Ha, you would have empathized with me; CNY is not CNY without a mahjong game, right?

Remembrance

It rained today
Afterward
The grass glistened as the sun set
The birds sang their song
As dark descended
I remembered you today Mei Phing
As I laboured over the edits
Of a book I would otherwise never have read
You would have wondered maybe
At the ludicrous state of my mind
As you would have over the length of our days
As we laboured on without you
Limping into the shadows of tonight
Book without end

hk2009

The last time I was in Hong Kong was in Dec. 2005, when I received news of your sudden illness; that you had leukimia. I was shocked, angry and felt helpless. I asked a friend if she knew of any bone marrow donors and transplant facilities in HK. The next day, I was at the famous Wong Tai Sin temple seeking divine help to save your life. I made a donation pledge if you get well. When I received a call at 3am, I knew it was bad news; you had passed away. I returned to KL with a broken heart.

I was back in HK last week, and visited the WTS temple to lodge a protest. Of course, I know there is no such thing as divine intervention. Still, your death - sudden and premature - was unacceptable; the grief and pain that it caused is immeasurable. I asked myself whether I had come to HK to seek closure; may be? But there is no denying that I still miss you very much.

I see you in my dreams

I see you in my dreams and in this dream i want to stay,

But all too soon the stirring of wakefulness reaches through,

And with consciousness comes reality, Then a wave of pain descends upon my being,

Reaching deep down, squeezing my heart until I cry out in agony,

Hot tears flow freely and sobbing aloud seems the only relief,

Until the instinct for survival takes control,

And instead be grateful for the time with you,

For the light and warmth you brought to my life,

Forever in my heart, my angel........

Touching Base

Its been a while since I wrote... not much excitement to report. But I just got a new toy. Yeah its an ideapad. Been spending time loading it up with stuff that I like having on my machine. Not taken it outdoors yet but am sure we'll both love the treat. Me and my new toy that is... :)

Oh I just came back from Penang. Another one of my impromptu trips with my salsa buddies. It was interesting as I got to get a taste of the salsa scene in Penang. Very small group compared to KL. Most of the faces I already know. The first time I met most of them was on one of their many trips to KL for salsa. The place they danced on the weekend is a restaurant by the sea so the setting is rather romantic. And so we danced to music brought by one of the local salsa enthusiast and sea breeze softly brushing our sweat covered skin. The soft lighting from the parked yacht formed the background adding to the resort feel of the environment. Really all that's needed to complete the picture was some tables with white table cloths and candle light.

That was really the high light of the trip. However, I was quite disappointed that we did not get to stop for the 'chee cheong fun'. Sigh..... what a shame.

I Feel Good

I didn't think I would say that after feeling really lousy over the weekend. I don't know what hit me in the wee hours of last Friday. I threw up 3x followed by runs. The doctor said it's stomach flu, but I suspect it's reflux considering I had a similar attack years ago but minus the runs. I've to restrict my diet to plain toast and water or 100plus without the fizz or better, porridge without the trimmings. No complaints though, peanut porridge never tastes so yummy.

This morning, just before I left for work, I had the TV on to see who's leading in the US Open. The game was tight; Roger Federer and Del Potro were playing the fifth set to decide the winner. I left the flat without waiting for the final score, but hoping for an upset. When I reached my office and logged in Bloomberg, I saw the news. Del Potro had beaten Federer, yeah!
At the same time, I received an sms from my housemate who is a Federer fan and I teased him about his `loss'. He replied that `it's only a game'. So I said, `I feel good'. Happy Birthday, MP!!

Dream of 9 9

So I was driving, then I received a phone call from you. I was told to come meet you at your apartment. So I went and the lobby door was locked. In true Malaysian style I waited for someone to come out and made my entrance. I recalled in the lift, you lived in Level 9, Unit 9.

When I walked out of the lift I felt it was a very high place, windy and cold enough that i could see my own breath. I soon developed acrophobia but looked down a few times and I got used to it. Soon I was in front of your door with a typical steel grills commonly found in asian homes. There you were in your intel clothes you got free of mom. Complete with your housemates, SawHong and LiHuey and one other unknown fella. To top it off you were a wee bit chubby....

In the dream, I already realized you shouldn't be here. So this must be a dream. But instead of asking more interesting questions, we were engaged in regular small talk as if nothing happened. Unfortunately my realization that it was a dream also caused me to wake up. It wasn't a very pleasant feeling though.

Anyway, when i woke up, my mobile showed a reminder. 9 of September, a friend is leaving UK. Due to the settings the reminder would not have appeared the night i went to bed. 9 of September another friend is coming to bunk at my place as well. Naturally i told the friend who was leaving uk about the dream. She immediately assumed she's gonna die in a plane crash. Other then friends coming and going, 9 of September was pretty uneventful.

Still trying to figure out if it means something. Perhaps you were referring to 4D numbers.....090909. 9 September 2009. All in all the significance of that date it's still a mystery to me.

Anyway happy birthday. You would have been in your mid 30s you old fart.